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One Side: Beth

At times she films me while having a meal. It's jarring to spot myself on her social media – it feels like a jumpscare.

My best friend of a decade, Marielle, calls herself the “creativity monarch”. It can be amusing for a bit, but it strains our friendship.

Being highly outgoing, she feels the need to document everything constantly. During meals out, she says, “The phone eats first,” and snaps pictures with the flash on, which induces embarrassment. I don’t like it when other people see her posing or filming – I get vicarious awkwardness. It also frustrates me because meals lose their warmth.

She's not quite an influencer yet, but she is trying to be. She creates vlogs about city life, a day in her life, and her work as a stylist. The material is quality, credit where it's due, but I prefer not to be dragged into it. Sometimes she films me while dining, or just accompanying her. Later, I appear on her feed afterwards, and it pops up like a surprise: I might be bare-faced, making a strange expression or photographed mid-bite. It feels invasive.

Marielle also anticipates that I will to film her at inopportune moments. Often I'm in conversation to someone else, or we're simply hanging out in the street. I feel like our bond has turned into me serving as her free crew. She has the means to employ someone if she wanted high-quality content. Upon mentioning my unease about the situation, she brushed it off. I've been invited to a couple of brand events, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I invest helping her make content.

I’m grateful that Marielle has helped me with my design career, but I resist our connection to become merely a tally of favours. I don’t feel she's insincere or dishonest, but at times I feel that if the camera is out, we will begin acting in a way that presents a favorable image for her vlog.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and record me laughing with someone. It’s so silly. I need her to understand that our 10-year friendship still has limits. I enjoy spending time with her, but I also want to experience it without being filmed, edited, or posted for an viewers. I’m not a prop for her online persona.

The Defence: The Content Creator's View

I hope my friend to see that the creations we produce together can get us a foot in the door.

I am passionate about shooting content. It’s not just a pastime; it's integral to who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online enables me to express myself and engage with people in novel forms.

I wouldn't label myself as a professional creator yet, but it's savvy to make money from your passions. I look up to people on social platforms who pull off that style of informal, self-made content creation.

Content creation is my interpretation of engaging with life: noticing the details, sharing them with an viewership that appreciates the craft behind it. It's never my aim to make my friend uncomfortable. Bringing her to industry events was my way of offering access, giving her a chance to witness exclusive moments that could benefit her professional path too. That isn't leverage, it's simply being realistic.

I’d still take her to these events even if she refused to assist me, but I want her to see what the work we create together can get us: an opening. I know not all people enjoys being filmed, but sometimes spontaneity is what makes material authentic. Being recorded occasionally is part and parcel of being my companion. I would delete anything she asked, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don’t expect anyone to be my personal filmmaker, but companions support one another in small ways. I thought recording a clip now and then would be enjoyable for her. Creativity thrives in collaboration, and having my friend around makes endeavors energetic and enjoyable. I don't compel her to take part in anything, and I’d never deliberately humiliate her. But filming together occasionally is part of how I document our shared experiences.

I cherish Beth’s friendship deeply and don’t want content creation to drive a wedge between us. I’m willing to find middle ground: like requesting permission before recording, and avoiding shots that might make her uncomfortable.

This is not about control, it's regarding expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Obviously content creation is not a replacement for real connection: it’s just part of how I live my life and I want her to be included in a way that’s agreeable for both of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Is it right for her to stop filming herself and Beth when they are out together?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a friend film you. I get that it’s Marielle’s passion, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my work. Perhaps she can find like-minded creators to create content with. With the uncertain future of AI, human connections are the only thing we have – cherish them!
Liberty, 25

When pursuing something professionally, it's unfair to expect your friends for assistance repeatedly, even if they have done it before. While she enjoys creating, that doesn't imply everyone around her is content. She must to honor Beth’s privacy.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love producing videos and showing off her life publicly, but it’s not for everybody. It’s nice she has assisted Beth’s career, but she needs to hear what her friend desires.
Emma, 27

It sounds like you care about each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the focus in your relationship. Foster some real memories, where genuine feelings are stored, not digital scrapbooks. Even celebrities who seem to share their worlds actually have more privacy than it appears.
Sarah, 53

Marielle appears to be neither present nor genuine when they're together – she's on the job. Both seem confused as to where the line is. The answer is not found in trying to alter one another, but in each setting clear limits around what feels acceptable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable middle ground.
A final view, 71

Now You Be the Judge

In an online poll: has she been over-exposing their bond?